I Am My Own Greatest Idol.

I read a lot of posts and articles on marriage. (Hey, what can I say? I'll be a bride in less than 6 months!) Most of them are about the same things:

1) How to make your marriage better.
2) How to better cater to your spouse's needs.
3) What qualities/traits you need to make a lasting marriage.

One thing that I keep reading that's directed at the women is to make sure to "take time to look good for your husband". Put some make-up on, wear something that shows off your curves, etc. 
Well, ladies, what if you were to take time everyday to make yourself attractive spiritually? We spend at least an hour everyday prepping ourselves for the day ahead. Admit it, that prep time is usually what takes up the time until you have to get going. It takes up time that could be spend in fellowship with God.
I, for one, have never been very good at keeping up with devotions or getting up early to fit them in. But, I have been pretty good at getting up in enough time to do my hair, pick out nice clothes and put on make-up after a 10-20 minute shower. 
Here's the sucker punch question: Why don't we put getting on our spiritual armor first? Why isn't becoming attractive from the inside a priority to being attractive on the outside?
I love wearing make-up and wearing nice clothes that makes Keegan, my fiance, smile. But, ultimately, he's not marrying me for that. In fact, in one of our pre-marriage counseling session his dad (the one officiating us) asked us what drew us to the other. Keegan's answer was that he was drawn to how he always saw me with my morning devotions with my Bible in hand. 
My husband-to-be was, and is still, attracted to my fellowship with God. Not my make-up or clothes.

Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.

Colossians 3:5

Our passion is towards ourselves. The person we put the most time towards in our day is ourselves. 

We covet ourselves! We have taken our own bodies from God and half the time don't even ask what He wants us to do with them! You may see asking God's opinion on clothes and make-up as silly, but He doesn't! Our bodies are His and we've taken them away because we want control over them.

How sad is that?

He made us in the womb. Our eye color, hair color, skin type...everything. He made every aspect of you inside and out for a reason. Yet, we go changing everything.

Face it people, men and women. We have become our own idols. According the this verse...we've all committed idolatry. 

When God showed me this I was so shocked that I didn't have words. There are even times I put these blogs and my manuscript before my fellowship with God. You may be doing "Godly" things, but it all comes down to how much personal fellowship you have with Him.

One of the girls...

Taylyr Jane

Give Me Words to Speak & Let the Spirit Lead.

Be very careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the LORD's will is.

Ephesians 5:15-17

When God calls us to do things for Him, we need to stop what we're doing and go do it! Even if it's something just between you and Him.

God gives us daily opportunities to get closer to His heart and the hearts of others. Sometimes He gives us chances to even get closer to our own hearts.

We miss moments to become knitted at the heart with other people and with Him when we hesitate and walk away in fear or embarrassment. 

Then, there's doing what God says one time, but then hearing Him tell you to do something else and instead of going you say, "Eh, I did that Godly-thing yesterday. I think I've done my holy share for the week."

How stupid can we be?

We push away chances for God to bless us, bless someone else, bond with us, show someone else who He is...the list of what we pass up is endless.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

1 Timothy 1:7

Ever wonder why the Spirit didn't make us timid? 

It would be useless for us to be timid when He's trying to get things done. You know what's sad? We're timid anyway! So, we still get in the way of Him getting things done!

We need to stop that!

I remember a couple of times where God has told me to go talk to people, but they were usually either people I didn't know or people I didn't like. Plus, I didn't know what He wanted me to say. I was unnerved. That's half the battle isn't it? Trusting that God will give us words. We want to "approve" of what we're going to be saying. 

What makes me feel really sorry that I was too unnerved to do what He asked is that I took away not only God and me moments. I took away a God moment from another person.

Declare His glory among the nations, His wonders among all peoples.

Psalms 96:3

We need to stop being ashamed of our Lover and what He does. We should brag more about how God romances us than the beautiful diamond necklace our spouse just bought us.

One of the girls...

Taylyr Jane

Flexability: He Never Breaks Me, Only Bends.

Does anyone remember that song by David Crowder Band? I love their song How He Loves.

"He is jealous for me.

Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree.

Bending beneath the waves of His wind and mercy.

And all of a sudden I am unaware of His affections eclipsed by glory.

And I realized just how wonderful You are and how great Your affections are for me."

These are some of my favorite lyrics in the song. I can sit still and drink in the promises of God's grace. He is gentle, but firm. His new, daily mercies are waves of wind. Waves of wind--strong and graceful, but you can't see it physically. You feel it. And then His affections are eclipsed by glory! I love that wording! He is jealous for me.

He is jealous for me. 

The one who looks in the mirror daily and finds something wrong. The one who talks harshly to people sometimes. The one who plays the blame game. The one who falls short of this eclipsed glory.

"-for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."

Romans 3:23&24

I have fallen short of the glory of God daily. But, I am also justified freely by His grace! Because of Christ Jesus! 

Wow. Have you ever just sat still and thought about that? If Jesus hadn't gone through so much awful pain then we wouldn't be free to have the romance and relationship with God that we're completely free to have now!

One last note: notice how the song says we're bending beneath these waves and this wind. Not breaking. God doesn't break us, but when we do break He picks up the pieces and turns us into a masterpiece even more beautiful than before.

One of the girls......
Taylyr Jane

Falling for the Arms of God

In the midst of doing my devotions while waiting for my next class, I looked out the window to process the words I just read. The season is changing and trees are releasing their leaves onto the ground. However, there's always those leaves that cling to the tree no matter how strong that wind gets.
I watched a couple of those leaves fall and touch the ground for only seconds before the wind carried them away again.
God is like a tree-strong, unmoving. We are like the leaves. The wind come and some of us fall to the ground and others cling to the tree no matter how hard that wind gets. But, although the wind makes us fall down to the ground sometimes, God's very own wind picks us up off that ground and takes us to new places.
God doesn't let us falling to the ground get into the way of Him using us for His purpose if we allow it. 

 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah. The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah. Psalm 46:1-3,7 

Even though that winds rips our worlds apart and creates chaos in our lives, God holds us and rocks us lovingly in His embrace!

God's wind: peace in the chaos, a knowledge that you're taken care of no matter what, faith that He will hold you.

The Bad wind: complete chaos, anxiety, unrest, doubt, defeat.

Solomon writes about his God being his stronghold even if the earth changes. Even if the mountains slip into the sea. Even if the mountains shake and the waters roar. Solomon was swept up and taken by the wind of God even though he fell from God in his battles with lust and women. God didn't allow His son to be taken captive and held down by the bad wind until he was crushed by his devouring mistakes.

Go look up "By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue North and stay quiet. Lay down and let you ears fill with the assurances of God. Falling asleep with those words in your ear is okay too.

One of the girls,
Taylyr

Cooking Catch!: Baked Ziti

I made this a couple of weeks ago and it's so yummy and inexpensive! Especially if you're learning to cook! ;)
See this recipe at:  http://cheapwise.blogspot.com/2012/07/cater-your-own-party.html?m=1

Also, I do realize that the link doesn't make itself a link on my posts, so for any links just copy it from here and paste it to the address bar and press "enter".

Enjoy! :)

One of the girls.....
Taylyr

Hear All About It! I'm Writing A Book!

Hey guys! This isn't an "actual post" (there will be one soon!), however I wanted to share my book in the making with you! It's called Hold Your Heart.

(I made the cover, but the pictures are not mine. They are from google.)

Here's the summary:

"She was almost there when a hand reached out and grabbed her. Before she could turn to see who it was, a blindfold was placed over her eyes and she was pulled into the alley." Alana and Dani are 17 year old best friend. They have been for years. However, that all changed when 22 year old Bruno Chives throws himself into Dani's world. Will he be what splits Alana and Dani after all these years? Is Dani safe with Bruno?

If ya wanna check it out follow this link:
http://www.wattpad.com/story/24177539-hold-your-heart

Thank you guys for ALL of your support of my writings, whether it be my blog, this work-in-progress, or just in prayer.

One of the girls, 
Taylyr

This Calls for Back Up!

Oh. My. Goodness!
Did you people know that God is amazing?????? 
So, Keegan and I are going through premarital counseling and one of the things I'm working on is being a forgiving woman towards my forgetful man. I have been struggling (and did even more so at the beginning of our engagement) at not getting mad or getting over being mad at my lovely, amazing, flexible fiance. 
That being said, God did His awesome thing just a few minutes ago and totally told me something I needed: to be forgiving (he hasn't made me mad, but it's always a good reminder, right?). A page I like on facebook called ' Beautiful Marriage' posted some incredible wisdom about marriage (I know what you're think....WHAT??? THEY POST ABOUT MARRIAGE? I WOULD'VE NEVER CAUGHT THAT!) and I clicked the share button. Well, the  link didn't post so I deleted that post and tried again. I scrolled down the page until I saw that 'Beautiful Marriage' heading and clicked share and yeah.
However......
I scrolled down more and saw the post I had wanted to post......
WHAT DID I JUST POST???????
I quickly went to my profile and saw what I had actually posted.
You know what it said?






Wow..........
And here I thought our counselor was crazy for saying I had such a problem! (It's my father-in-law to be lol)
But, the ultimate Counselor was backing him up.
God is good.

One of the girls......
Taylyr 

Taytay Tid Bit: Bleeding Blisters

You know when your man gets hurt and shows you the cut or scab or whatever it is?  Well, my fiance (Keegan) got a blister that has healed, bled again, healed, bled again, and so on. I've been giving him all the advice I know of how to make it heal all the way without bleeding again. So far...he's apparently "tried" everything I suggest. (You know men, they say they do....but who knows..) 
He showed it to me again tonight and it was black and bleeding again. (Looking kinda gross....) Exasperated that it's still doing that, I dragged him over to my mom, showed it to her, and asked for her "magic mom advice" on what to do. Her first response (was actually "ewww" just like me but anyway) was to ask him if he's washed it.....

"No....."

*Face palm*
After all that! 

Anyway, I got to thinkin' that this illustrates what happens when we don't "wash" our hearts. They get black, dirty, and they never heal from being hurt. If we were to read all the self-help books, or listen to all the worship songs, or go to every service held in the church in one week we wouldn't get any better or heal any faster if we didn't take time to sit quietly and pour our hearts out to God for Him to clean. Imagine how much faster the wounds of our hearts would heal if we got them cleaned by the living water!


Get cleaned so you don't have to wonder why your heart is black, bleeding, and still not healed.

(BTW, Keegan is being a VERY good sport about this post.) 

One of the girls...
Taylyr

The Real Life Alphas

I was watching a show called Alphas today and I don't know what it is about the theme song and title part in general, but it always makes me think about how cool it would be to be one.
If you don't know what an "alpha" is, it's a person with special abilities due to a part of their brain or bodies that's more advanced or developed than usual. These are, of course, fiction.

I love the show because one of the main characters, Dr. Rosen, finds these alphas and helps them hone their gifts and learn how to use them. He also counsels them because most of them have been discriminated against due to their abilities-even by family. This reminds me a lot of what God does for us-with some differences of course.

 1) God doesn't have to find us, but He seeks us out.
Similar to Dr. Rosen (only better) He seeks us out. He runs to us and embraces us! Even when we still have a spot of pig slop on our lips.

2) God helps us learn how to use our God-given gifts.
After we're safe in His arms He shows us what gifts He's given us. These gifts are crafted and sewn straight into the fabric of who we are. He has sculpted us with His own, bare hands with clay that's unique to only us!

3) He shows us what He wants us to do with these gifts.
Dr. Rosen finds these alphas to create a team that helps the government with crimes. The alphas use their gifts to help. God has given us each a dream, goal, ministry, etc. that only we can accomplish the way we accomplish it! He tells us what we're meant to use these gifts for and how they fit into His amazing plan for the world!

4) He stands by us even when we're persecuted.
The most recent episode I watched was season 1, episode 10 when all the alphas are drugged and taken into custody- Dr. Rosen included. Dr. Rosen stands by then so closely over the course of the show that he's arrested with the rest of them, even though he's not an alpha himself! God stands by us when we get bullied or humiliated or beaten up or abandoned for His team! He's not here on earth in physical form with us, but He made sure He would be persecuted right alongside us when He died on that cross for us! He stands that closely to us!

We are God beautiful, wonderful, amazing, hand sculpted "alphas"! Only we're the real deal!

One of the girls.....
Taylyr

Taytay Tid Bit: Smelly for God

These smaller posts will be called "Taytay Tid Bits" from now on because sometimes I honestly just have smaller thoughts and I don't think the size of what God presses in my heart should keep me from posting it! So, here's the first "Taytay Tid Bit"!

You know how when you smell pine, you automatically know that a pine tree's nearby? Or you at least think of one.
How about when you see a yellowing leaf on the ground and right away identify it as an aspen leaf?

We should be known by our "spiritual smell" and God given identity. These should tell people that we belong to God. When we talk to people they should feel an ambiance of God's love slicing through their walls of worldly defense! How we dress can display how we look at ourselves- His perfect, wonderful work of art! It's like when we go to job interviews. We're representing not only ourselves, but a whole line of what brought us to that point:
How our parents raised us,
how much we respect others around us,
how much we respect ourselves.

Believe it or not, respecting ourselves shows how much we respect the one who made us!

One of the girls...
Taylyr

God's Psychology

I had a Psychology exam today.
I was confused by two questions, but took the fifty-fifty chance after process of elimination and answered what I thought was correct. I kept the two questions in mind and right when I got out of class, I went to my notes and checked my answers. 
Happy with myself, I was walking to the library and a thought hit me, like always: after we got through a spiritual test, or just our day, do we go to the Bible and see if we got things right? 
We got through our days just living. We don't always check the outcome of our actions before or even after we do them. If we checked with God and the Bible everyday to see what we need to work on then we would learn better for the next time! Everyday we can inch closer and closer to 100%.
We can't throw away our "notes" just because the situation, test, etc. is done. We have to re-look at them daily because those notes will be the foundation for the next set of notes. And then those notes will be the foundation for the next ones. So on and so forth! 
We can't just keep them in our working memory (short term memory, as it's commonly referred to). We have to rehearse, exercise and visualize them daily.
How do we visualize them? 
Surround yourself with people that can give you a solid, healthy visual of what this looks like! If you have a mentor, make sure that they do this. 
We want to be prepared for the pop quizzes and tests of our spiritual warfare!

Another Note:
There was an experiment done with pregnant mothers.
Scientists would have the pregnant mothers read The Cat in the Hat out loud everyday until the baby was born. Once they were born, they hooked two bottles to two TV's. One TV played a recording of a stranger read the book when the baby sucked on one bottle. The other TV played a recording of the mom reading the book when the baby sucked on the other bottle. The baby sucked on the second bottle more often, showing that it liked the sound of the mom's voice more. The sound of the mom's voice and the rhythm of the words from the book soothed the baby.
God's word and voice should soothe us. When we hear His voice on one side and another's voice on the other, we should always prefer God's voice more.

One of the girls....
Taylyr

Click.

I've been working on my book (Hold Your Heart) for a majority of the day and got a whole 7 pages typed (WhooHoo!!!). I had gotten good advice from an author friend to create a daily goal for myself on this book, so I made my goal to write 2 pages everyday. Since I've made that goal, I've been more productive! 
Do we set goals for ourselves in our relationship with God?
"I will try to be more patient today!"
"I'll get this person to come to Christ today!"
"I won't kill my sibling today!"
Etc, etc, etc!
Do we get more from our relationship when we do that? I personally try to do things like read my Bible more, or journal more about Him (and less about my dramatic emotions), and try to pray more. However, I usually forget these things by the next day because I get busy. A professor gives me another paper, or my friends want to hang out or I have college group or my club or BLEH! There's always another "or" hanging around for me to add to my schedule. I don't make time for my own goals. If I'm going to make them, I should make time for them right? It's very hard sometimes. 
I'm moving towards a time very quickly that will add another priority to my life: my husband to be. What will my goals be to grow closer to my husband? I need to learn how to grow closer to God in my goals first because if I do that He will ultimately teach me how to grow closer to my husband. Its a wonderful cycle: Grow closer to God= grow closer to husband= a happy me! :D (Results may vary)
God will show me what these goals are supposed to be. His goals and my goals should be parallel and going the same direction and coming to the same destination. 

I was talking to one of my sisters about love (dun, dun, DUN!!!!) and I told her that I've learned how important it is for you and the one you marry to be facing that same direction in your life. Facing the same ministry desires. Otherwise, one or the other will have to give up their dream to go with what their spouse wants. Eventually, you'll be sad you gave up that dream. 
I dated some guys that didn't have the same ministry goals as I did (or not one at all) and I had to force myself to ignore that part of me that knew that I would never click with them like I was supposed to. But you know what? On March 24, 2014 I figured out why I was never meant to click with anyone else. (He asked to court me on that day) One day, it clicks. And it'll sound like when you turn a key inside a lock and you hear all those gears turning the right direction to open up. A lot of times we turn the gears the wrong way hoping that they're going the right way! And it takes us a while to realize why the door's not opening. But once the right one does, smoothly and correctly, you won't ever want to close the door again. You won't ever want to lock it back up. You just want to go inside and see what you've been waiting for. 

A lot of my friends have found their locks lately and it's amazing to see. When you find that right lock and you hear that click of the gears, you don't re-lock it and walk away thinking you'll come back later. You open it! Sometimes we're afraid to unlock the door because we're afraid it won't be what we expect. 
Guess what.
It won't be.
That's the beauty and magnificence that is called marriage! This is what God designed us for. (Well, part of it.) 
So, stop trying to unlock gears that are turning the wrong way and don't be afraid when you hear that click. 

 (Me- The key and my hubby to be- lock ;))
One of the girls.....
Taylyr   
  

Soldered: the Insight of the Engaged.

I went to the jewelry store today and picked up my rings (now put together as one!) and realized how weird it felt. I can't twist them in separate directions out of boredom or watch as my partially OCD fiancé tries to straighten them. 

When we get married in 7 months it'll feel strange for a while. A good strange. I felt that way making a courting commitment this last March (24th) and then promising my marriage to this man in May (18th). God is going to "solder" us together. Trials will make us heat up and break down sometimes, but God is using that to mold us together more and more until our final "I dos" on May 30, 2015. 

It will feel weird to not go to separate houses at the end of the day or to see each other a lot more of the day. Or to share a home (a physical one). But us being soldered together is beautiful. No matter how much this all may terrify me sometimes. 

I was talking to God tonight and I thanked Him for helping me choose Keegan every morning, every night, and a lot in between. He helps me continue to love and choose him, even when he's not perfect. 

Getting married makes me nervous and scares me sometimes ("what am I getting into??") but all great adventures do. 

All great adventures do. 

Trust me, my honey is an adventure in and of himself. ;)

Continue to pray for us both as we balance college (16 credit hours for me and I think 17 for him), planning a wedding, and life in general. We appreciate the love, support, and prayer! 

One of the girls.....

Taylyr

Meant to Hold the Precious

Do you know why He does this?

To ultimately brings us back to Him.

He has made us to glorify Him! (This is so beautiful!) We often times forget our purpose and give ourselves-our emotions, our bodies, and our lives-to things that were made by us for OUR OWN PURPOSES. 

While we're tugging at our Daddy's hand to come do the things we want, He lifts our eyes up to the hills! When we want to give it all up and surrender our purpose entirely to the chains of sin and death, He shows us where our hope comes from-the maker of heaven and earth! 

He wants us to be a part of our own plans! He doesn't want to hand our purpose off to someone else because our purpose is designed for us! No one could ever do it better! 

We are molded to hold something precious, but no one holds the same thing.

One of the girls.....

Taylyr

Cherish the Love.

I was on facebook, drinking coffee (Starbucks <3), and waiting for my next class. Like most days, a photo caught my eye as I scrolled down the news feed. It said, "It only takes a few seconds to hurt someone. But it takes years to repair the damage. Cherish the hearts that love you."

It's sad to think and believe that people stop loving as soon as they're hurt. Damage to the heart is inevitable when you're loving like Jesus did.
It's true that it only takes seconds to hurt a person and it's also true that it can take a while for a person to heal from what you say. But, the love that Jesus had for people was not the kind that broke down and was destroyed by hurt. In fact, just because a person hurts you doesn't mean they don't love you.
How many times have you had to be blunt or honest with someone you love? How many had to say something you know might hurt them?

Hurt does NOT equal hate!

Parents have to discipline their children in a way that may hurt sometimes, but they still love them!
Do heated words mean a break up or divorce? They shouldn't.
I'm personally learning that just because you argue with the one you love doesn't mean the relationship is doomed to failure or "isn't meant to be". In fact, being honest can sometimes show more love than pretending to be supportive. (However, there is a time and place for support above all else.)
We imperfect humans are still learning how to love. We all claim to know how, but by who's definition?
Loving like Jesus, the way we were made to love, can be frustrating and hard. But, as children who are being raised to love the way we were meant to, we have to go out into the world loving even though we know we're going to get hurt.

Hurt cuts pieces out of you, but God uses those gashes to create a more unique and stronger child. He does this by placing a soothing, warm washcloth of love to stop the bleeding.

Love isn't fair.  Don't choose love expecting it to be.
Shouldn't what God tells us love is be enough?

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I know some of you just glazed through those words. You know what they say. You've read them a million times. Bible study after Bible study, and sermon after sermon touches on those 4 verses. We keep coming back to them.

We should always come back to them.

One of the girls.....
Taylyr 

ITS FREE?????

So, tonight I went to a movie thing at my school (ENMU WOOO!) and my friend got in line for their consession stand. We go in and my friend looks at me empty handed (no money :P) and says, "You know it's free right?" As most of you can imagine, I went to go get free stuff. Since us college people LOVE free stuff. ;)

I was in line and it got me thinking that this is how people react to God's free gift to us. I mean, I was looking ahead in line to make SURE it didn't cost money. Why is it so hard to believe things can be free? Everything has a price, right? Not the love of God. :) 

He doesn't require money or stuff. Just our devotion and love. ENMU does this for its students because they come to school here. They're COMMITTED to the school. Jesus has a lot more to offer than snacks!

One of the girls......

Taylyr