Remember that one boy the parents didn't approve of? Do the words, "You just don't get me," ring a bell? What about this one, "You don't know what I'm feeling"?
Girls, parents may not truly understand us about..most of the time, but, admit it, we don't understand ourselves about a third of the time.
It doesn't feel good to not know what's going on in our own minds, bodies and emotions because we've always thought that we where the ones that knew ourselves the best. Some of us have even been told.
It feels like a bedroom. It was once warm, familiar. We recognized everything. We remember putting everything we see into it. Little by little we see things we didn't put in. We find things we don't recognize. The fuzzy carpet on your floor turns into a smooth wood. The Powder Puff Girl poster on your wall is replaced by the face of a guy. Where is this coming from? We wake up and it's all different. Everyday it's different.
You feel out of control in the one area you thought you were in control of.
You know a story. BAM! Someone corrects your story.
You feel love. BAM! You don't know what love is.
You feel able. BAM! You're too immature or too young.
You feel hurt. BAM! You don't know what hurt is.
You cry. BAM! Cut the tears and grow up.
Looks like the world sees that you don't know so they try to convince you that they do know. When you don't believe that they do at all.
We teens tend to want to curl up in a ball with our iPods and cut the world out. Music has become the soothing voice of understanding. Not only does it help you define what you're feeling, it let's you know that not only are you not alone, but that what you want to say so bad is heard and validated.
Music is incredible, however God validates us everyday...even when we feel like no one's listening or we feel like we're too small. The world doesn't know everything, parents don't know everything, teachers don't know everything, even the oldest people in the world don't know everything...but, girls, we don't either. Only God does and why would we shut out the only one who does? Music is an amazing band aid, but God is the one who stitches us up and heals us.
One of the girls.....
Taylyr
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Monday, August 20, 2012
Self-Dependency Is Soo Overrated!
I imagine everyone has looked at themselves at least once in their lives and realized how far off the road they've been. If you somehow have missed this part of life I applaud you. Does this make you feel good? Not really, no.
The saddest part may be that all along you believed that you were on the road....what a blow!
A ministry is a hard rodeo. Some days it feels like you have the toughest bull in the pen and other days it's a piece of ice cream cake (oreo to be exact). On my road to ministry (still travlin'!) I've had times where I felt completely blindfolded. No clue. I can't see the bull until I'm well on and shaken. When I do look it in the eyes the fear flashes over me and all I want to do is put the blindfold back on. I liked it better when I was convinced everything was fine and dandy! But where is the peace? Was the sweep of calm on vacation? Did I put His voice on mute? Fine and dandy just don't cut it after staring that beast in the eye. All of a sudden you see the broken heart. You feel the stab of disappointment. The fear itself engulfs you knowing it's not hidden anymore. The blindfold isn't there to "protect" you anymore.
You're a big kid now! Go fight the beast! It's not that easy. I'm not strong enough. While you're sitting there defeated and ready for a fate you feel the slightest bit of warmth. That warmth surges through you; new and vibrant! Your worn, hard feet are now soft and smooth! Your hands, cramped and tired, are now strong! Your heart, disappointed and hurt, is now renewed and safe! You look up to see Him. Jesus; a father, a son, and a holy spirit. Jesus; a healer, a protector, and a friend. Jesus; a king, a servant, and wisdom itself. Wow... Tears fall down your new face with a healing sparkle as you take the hand; HIS hand. Once you do the beast is gone, shattered, dead FOREVER.
THIS is victory: when you take His hand because you realize you can't do it alone.
Not everyone is made for a ministry quite like mine. I'm not even sure what my ministry is yet. Do I want to know? I would LOVE to know! But I'm not ready yet. He is more than willing to wait for me to be ready. Self-dependency is soo overrated. ;)
The saddest part may be that all along you believed that you were on the road....what a blow!
A ministry is a hard rodeo. Some days it feels like you have the toughest bull in the pen and other days it's a piece of ice cream cake (oreo to be exact). On my road to ministry (still travlin'!) I've had times where I felt completely blindfolded. No clue. I can't see the bull until I'm well on and shaken. When I do look it in the eyes the fear flashes over me and all I want to do is put the blindfold back on. I liked it better when I was convinced everything was fine and dandy! But where is the peace? Was the sweep of calm on vacation? Did I put His voice on mute? Fine and dandy just don't cut it after staring that beast in the eye. All of a sudden you see the broken heart. You feel the stab of disappointment. The fear itself engulfs you knowing it's not hidden anymore. The blindfold isn't there to "protect" you anymore.
You're a big kid now! Go fight the beast! It's not that easy. I'm not strong enough. While you're sitting there defeated and ready for a fate you feel the slightest bit of warmth. That warmth surges through you; new and vibrant! Your worn, hard feet are now soft and smooth! Your hands, cramped and tired, are now strong! Your heart, disappointed and hurt, is now renewed and safe! You look up to see Him. Jesus; a father, a son, and a holy spirit. Jesus; a healer, a protector, and a friend. Jesus; a king, a servant, and wisdom itself. Wow... Tears fall down your new face with a healing sparkle as you take the hand; HIS hand. Once you do the beast is gone, shattered, dead FOREVER.
THIS is victory: when you take His hand because you realize you can't do it alone.
Not everyone is made for a ministry quite like mine. I'm not even sure what my ministry is yet. Do I want to know? I would LOVE to know! But I'm not ready yet. He is more than willing to wait for me to be ready. Self-dependency is soo overrated. ;)
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Control Freak
Who likes to be controlled?
I imagine not many people like it any more than I do. To feel overpowered feels, well, overpowering.
I've been having a little trouble with not letting different things control me. My desires (the maybe not so healthy ones), my frustrations, and most of all other people. Hmmm...yep. Those are all toughies.
Sometimes we don't let God have control.
No, don't deny it.
God is supposed to have control. Or at least he'd like to be. Isn't it better that way? Then why are we trying to throw Him off with all the junk? He's the most valuable treasure ever!
God wrote our stories a long time ago. He's not writing it as He goes along.
Jeremiah 29:11 tells us just what He has coming up for us!
'"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."' ~Jeremiah 29:11
Sounds like an amazing "control freak" to me. :)
One of the girls........
Taylyr
I imagine not many people like it any more than I do. To feel overpowered feels, well, overpowering.
I've been having a little trouble with not letting different things control me. My desires (the maybe not so healthy ones), my frustrations, and most of all other people. Hmmm...yep. Those are all toughies.
Sometimes we don't let God have control.
No, don't deny it.
God is supposed to have control. Or at least he'd like to be. Isn't it better that way? Then why are we trying to throw Him off with all the junk? He's the most valuable treasure ever!
God wrote our stories a long time ago. He's not writing it as He goes along.
Jeremiah 29:11 tells us just what He has coming up for us!
'"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."' ~Jeremiah 29:11
Sounds like an amazing "control freak" to me. :)
One of the girls........
Taylyr
Friday, January 27, 2012
Just Four Letters in a Row?
There's a song that says, "You say love is just a word, just four letters in a row..."
I know that I've thought of it that way before. It's a word to mean 'I like you more than a friend.' I see it used all over facebook and sometimes I just have to shake my head because it's used so simply.
I was talking to my dad the other night, having a "guy-talk", and I was telling him about some confusion on crushing on a guy. He asks me, "What do you mean by crushing?" and I said, " Well, I mean, I miss them when they're not around and wish they were." He gave me one of those fatherly looks that says, "I love you, but you have a lot to learn." lol He told me, "That is not a crush, that's just liking having someone around." What? That's what I have always thought crushing was- wanting them around you a lot. Well, you could imagine how clearly, but at the same time more confusing, that made everything inside.
That talk brought on an all too familiar small voice inside my head. The small voice told me, "The love you're looking for is found between a guy and a girl. That love is great, but here you are looking for love and it's right smack in front of your face!" What a pep-talk.
My search for a boyfriend/future mate hasn't really been something I've let God all the way in on. I've always had the girlfriends to talk things over with and make it all clear out, but I don't necessarily have that luxury here. You know how it's easier to talk to someone face to face? That's a big thing for me is being able to see their face. God is now having to take the place of that girlfriend. He should have had that place all along, but now it's something I'm going to really need.
I won't know what love is until I embrace the love that's in front of me. Love is not simple, but I don't think it's hard either. People just see it wrong; it's used too simply or as a complication. In reality, the world doesn't need any more exaggeration.
One of the girls.........
Taylyr
I know that I've thought of it that way before. It's a word to mean 'I like you more than a friend.' I see it used all over facebook and sometimes I just have to shake my head because it's used so simply.
I was talking to my dad the other night, having a "guy-talk", and I was telling him about some confusion on crushing on a guy. He asks me, "What do you mean by crushing?" and I said, " Well, I mean, I miss them when they're not around and wish they were." He gave me one of those fatherly looks that says, "I love you, but you have a lot to learn." lol He told me, "That is not a crush, that's just liking having someone around." What? That's what I have always thought crushing was- wanting them around you a lot. Well, you could imagine how clearly, but at the same time more confusing, that made everything inside.
That talk brought on an all too familiar small voice inside my head. The small voice told me, "The love you're looking for is found between a guy and a girl. That love is great, but here you are looking for love and it's right smack in front of your face!" What a pep-talk.
My search for a boyfriend/future mate hasn't really been something I've let God all the way in on. I've always had the girlfriends to talk things over with and make it all clear out, but I don't necessarily have that luxury here. You know how it's easier to talk to someone face to face? That's a big thing for me is being able to see their face. God is now having to take the place of that girlfriend. He should have had that place all along, but now it's something I'm going to really need.
I won't know what love is until I embrace the love that's in front of me. Love is not simple, but I don't think it's hard either. People just see it wrong; it's used too simply or as a complication. In reality, the world doesn't need any more exaggeration.
One of the girls.........
Taylyr
Monday, November 14, 2011
I'm A What??
Light. A golden ray of sunshine. The small warm spot on the floor.
What ever you call the sun it basically means the same idea.
God. Holy of Holies. Creator of earth.
What ever you call Him it basically refers to the same person.
It's funny how the sun can be put in a story as an example to describe God. Not following, right?
We've all had our moments where we're sitting in a sanctuary, the person talking is boring us to death, our eyes dart around looking for something more interesting.
I had one of my moments a few weeks ago.
My eyes scanning what seemed to be every inch of that sanctuary just waiting for the thing or person I knew would eventually draw my attention. I scanned the front of the sanctuary, my eyes running over a stain-glass window.
At the moment I looked at it a bright ray of light made the window light up and grasp a whole new appearance!
Well, my jaw didn't drop but God told me a rather interesting tid-bit about myself that I certainly did not know. He said, "You are a window."
Ummmm what? Did you just seriously tell me I'm a window?
Yeah, He did.
I understood exactly what He meant. What He told me sunk in and it all flooded in.
When God shines His light through us we take on a very different appearance than when people just take one look at us. We have all these different "colours", different gifts, talents, qualities that God uses to make the light He puts in us shine all the more brighter.
How do you think a ray of sunshine would come out through a window of all grey?
I am Taylyr Jane Davis and I was specially crafted by God and placed into the world and church to shine and bring glory to God! Wow, there are a lot of 'buts' in there. lol
One of the girls........
Taylyr Jane
What ever you call the sun it basically means the same idea.
God. Holy of Holies. Creator of earth.
What ever you call Him it basically refers to the same person.
It's funny how the sun can be put in a story as an example to describe God. Not following, right?
We've all had our moments where we're sitting in a sanctuary, the person talking is boring us to death, our eyes dart around looking for something more interesting.
I had one of my moments a few weeks ago.
My eyes scanning what seemed to be every inch of that sanctuary just waiting for the thing or person I knew would eventually draw my attention. I scanned the front of the sanctuary, my eyes running over a stain-glass window.
At the moment I looked at it a bright ray of light made the window light up and grasp a whole new appearance!
Well, my jaw didn't drop but God told me a rather interesting tid-bit about myself that I certainly did not know. He said, "You are a window."
Ummmm what? Did you just seriously tell me I'm a window?
Yeah, He did.
I understood exactly what He meant. What He told me sunk in and it all flooded in.
When God shines His light through us we take on a very different appearance than when people just take one look at us. We have all these different "colours", different gifts, talents, qualities that God uses to make the light He puts in us shine all the more brighter.
How do you think a ray of sunshine would come out through a window of all grey?
One of the girls........
Taylyr Jane
Sunday, October 23, 2011
I Won't Settle For Less. Part 2
I re-looked at my list of future husband/spouse qualities & realized that I didn't put some of the qualities I put down! lol
Here are the ones I didn't put down:
One of the girls...............
Taylyr
Here are the ones I didn't put down:
- Leadership.
- Humble.
- Doesn't have to prove everything to everyone.
- Loves to serve people.
- Tall.
- Supports me.
- Wants to learn about me.
- Will make an effort to learn about me.
- Flexible in planning.
One of the girls...............
Taylyr
Friday, October 21, 2011
I Won't Settle For Less.
This is my personal list of traits I came up with for my future boyfriend/spouse.
I went through some deep questioning of myself and into some deep thought to find some of these.
I guess i've thought about it before, but on a more "surface" level.
So, here is my list :) :
It's been a while since i've looked so deep inside of me & have let myself just be honest without scolding myself when I point out something I think my be impossible. I let myself truly dream.
Truly dreaming is when you don't give yourself boundaries and you just let yourself imagine in pure hopefullness. I've got to let myself do that more often. *dreamy sigh* :)
One of the girls...............
Taylyr <33
I went through some deep questioning of myself and into some deep thought to find some of these.
I guess i've thought about it before, but on a more "surface" level.
So, here is my list :) :
- He needs to be so enveloped in God that I have to go through God to get to him.
- Likes to notice little things and enjoyes them.
- Loves to laugh.
- Knows when to be serious and when to be funny.
- Simple-ish lol
- Comfortable with himself.
- Will fight for me.
- Expressive. (at least a lil)
- Clean.
- Needs to know how to LISTEN!
- Not afraid of hard work.
- Has at least a temporary goal for life/job.
- HONEST.
- Thoughtful.
- Athletic.
- Thinks before he speaks or does.
- Loves his family.
- Does not take offense easily.
- Strong; emotionally and physically.
- Awesomely random. :))
- Would put God before me always.
- Optimistic.
- Laid back.
- Likes to try to make everyday things fun.
- Is dependant on God before anything/one else.
- Can stand up to me. <----------Hahahahahahahaha!!!
- Not fearful.
- Soft hearted.
- Wise.
- Discerning.
- Affectionate.
- Needs to be the one God has held for me, can't be anyone else!!!
- Does not try to be perfect.
- Needs to CARE!
- Needs to be PURE!
- Loves kids!
- CREATIVE.
- Does not sugar coat everything.
It's been a while since i've looked so deep inside of me & have let myself just be honest without scolding myself when I point out something I think my be impossible. I let myself truly dream.
Truly dreaming is when you don't give yourself boundaries and you just let yourself imagine in pure hopefullness. I've got to let myself do that more often. *dreamy sigh* :)
One of the girls...............
Taylyr <33
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